This year was different. This year, I got disgusted with photo cards and other people's good news. I don't care this year. It has been a crappy year, and I didn't have the energy to pretend otherwise. I sent old fashioned Christmas cards and was hard pressed to do that.
I thought about trying to write a clever letter using the analogy of the flooded campsite on our trip to Virginia Beach in July. It would have been a funny but poignant letter. I would have talked about how all of the signs were there...the marshy ground, the lack of grass, the ruts from tires driving in mud...How we didn't pay attention to any of the signs, and how we were shocked when we came back from the aquarium to find our site in 5 inches of standing water. How we bugged out and went to a hotel and then found a new campsite nowhere near the beach, which was my main objective for camping. How we were put on a hill at the next site, which was fine, but challenging, and how freaking hot it was and how the bugs just ate us up, leaving welts that stayed for days and days.
I would have figured out a way to work all that into what this year was like. Kirk flying to Minnesota all the time to help with his dad, who was stuck in the basement because he couldn't do the stairs, his mom trying to take care of him but not succeeding. Kirk's work laying people off right and left, the writing on the wall for him but trying to ignore that his job was in jeopardy. Me getting an extra class at the last minute, something I'd never taught before and wasn't interested in teaching at all.
Then Kirk's dad being dropped at the rehab center, which fractured his neck and spinal vertebrae. Getting the call at 2 a.m. that if Kirk was hoping to see his dad before he passed, he should come now. Milt's injuries, caused by negligence, killing him a few days later. The trip to Minnesota for the funeral, seeing for myself how Jean should not be alone anymore because she has memory loss and her friends and neighbors are worried about her and wondering why we aren't doing anything. Coming home to begin the search for a place for her. One of the few good things finding a nice place a mile away from our house. Bringing her here on the sly because she wouldn't have come if she had thought she was staying for good. Having her live with us for an entire month. Finding furniture at the consignment stores and pretending we had it in storage so she wouldn't stress about the cost. Finally moving her in to her new place to "try it out for a few weeks" and thankfully, praise God, finding she likes it.
Then Kirk losing his job like he thought he might. Severance til the end of the year. Me still working, doing back to back senior retreats between Thanksgiving and Christmas that were incredibly stressful. Still trying to have meaningful lessons while being out for two full weeks. Trying to shop and have a good Christmas but worried about money (again). Not being able to do much of what I wanted to prepare for the holidays...
And all these sound like first world problems as I look back over this, but damn, it was a hard year, and I had no idea how to put this in a Christmas letter, so I just didn't.
The end.
No comments:
Post a Comment