A "Tall" Small? Give Me a Break!

I wasn't feeling particularly nice this afternoon when I pulled into the drive-thru at the national neighborhood coffee chain. I hadn't had my full second cup of coffee because Kirk drained the pot before he left, so I was a little grumpy.

"May I help you?" came the voice over the speaker.

I replied, "I'd like a small coffee, please. Non-fat milk and one sugar."

"Do you mean a 'Tall'?" said the voice.

"No, I mean a 'small'," I answered back, fully understanding that to this particular chain, "Tall" and 'small' are the same thing.

"Well," said the voice, "a 'Tall' is the same as a 'small.' So would you like a Tall?"

"No," I replied, "Tall and small are not the same things. Tall is TALL, and small is what I want."

"Well, ma'am," said the voice which was now becoming irritated with me, "at our coffee shop, small is 'Tall', medium is 'Grande', and large is Venti.' So what size coffee do you want?"

I sat there in my van, just shaking my head at our culture, where everything has to be bigger, larger, better, and nothing can truly be what it is.

I said, "So you're saying that 'Tall' is your smallest coffee, right?"

"Yes," came the reply.

"Then I'll take your smallest size, please," I grinned. I was determined not to ask for a 'Tall' small.

"That will be $1.80, please," said the voice, clearly irritated with me now. "Please drive through."

Well, okay, I didn't really have this conversation, I'm to nice or too chicken or something. But I wanted to! Maybe someday...